Today is the start of another new year. A point in time made more momentous with the ongoing pandemic. The thought on all our minds, on my mind certainly – Is 2021 going to be the year to put the pandemic behind us? Whether it does or it doesn’t, it certainly is a point in time for us to review where we are in life.
For me, the pandemic and its impact has taught me a lot. It has put a perspective on the process of life itself. I have learned to drown out the unnecessary things happening around me. Learnt to focus only on those that really matter to me. Most importantly, on the people that really matter to me.
As I reflect on my journey so far the one thing that is sure, is how my friends have been the anchor of my life, at times even more so than immediate family. From a very young age, even though I was the quiet one and perhaps the boring one, I had very strong and meaningful friendships. Even my business has been built working with one of my closest and dearest friends over the last decade and a half.
So when it was suggested in one of our discussions that for January 2021, the start of perhaps a most important period in mankind’s history, let us have FRIENDSHIP as the theme, I instantly jumped at it.
From my perspective the closest and foremost friend is me. If I can truly make friends with myself and love myself, only then can I be a good friend to others. I must be comfortable within my skin and unconditionally love myself and the body I am housed in. I must not judge myself, only then I will not judge the ones closest to me. I must give myself some latitude, stop being my own toughest critic. In the more recent past I have somehow become my own best friend. Not because I have tried, but because once the thought dawned on me I simply internalised it, accepted it and became it.
The next and most important friend is my life partner. For life to hold steady it is most important to be besties even as you are lovers. My life partner has been my rock and my closest friend from the day we started dating. As true friends we don’t judge each other but love each other for what we truly are. And considering that we probably see our ugliest dimensions it is creditable to be true and dearest friends.
With our children I am not sure about how to be friends. I sincerely try very hard but that very real generation gap continues to play its part and I never quite get there. Our boys are amazing young adults. Very Independent, very strong willed and very focused on where they want to go. For me it is a privilege to have the ringside seats watching their lives play out. But I have to constantly be mindful about the fine line between watching and participating.
Beyond our little family of four, I have truly been blessed with a number of very very genuine friendships. The closest set of “Us” have been together since the age of six. Unconditional love has been received and been given in equal measure. These are the trophies of my life. I deeply value each and every friendship I have had the honour to experience. These are the people who have steadfastly stepped in to hold my hand whilst I navigate through some of my toughest challenges. Then there is the aspect that whatever opportunity I have I am happiest spending time with my friends. I have never been the life of the party, more the boring type as I said earlier, but there is such comfort and joy being in the company of genuine friends.
I am perhaps the most excited about this month’s theme as my most valuable treasure is the friendships I share. These are the people most special and dear to me. These are the people I reach out to when I happy, when I am low and at times for no reason at all. The most important one is when we reach out for “no reason at all”. Staying connected with friends during these times when meeting them is not always easy is critical for me to maintain my sanity. Creating bubbles for ourselves we do meet some who are closest to us. And for those of us who are Covid Warriors please continue to take due care and DO NOT treat it as a visa to drop all care, even as we gingerly step out into the world.
As I continue my journey I am also cementing some new friendships, reigniting some old ones that got left along the way and overall learning to stay more connected and more rooted in my life. I am most excited about this too as it adds a new dimension in my life. Lots of new learnings and new experiences.
One of my dearest friends has been exploring the idea of living in a commune with some of our closest friends. Wouldn’t that make for an ideal and divine life.
In this restrictive and yet introspective time that the universe has given to us, the realisations… that people are all that matter, that relationships are all that matter, that love is the only truth, that experiences are our true wealth….. give our journey some sensible meaning and purpose.
Right through the month of January 2021 we shall continue to bring you perspectives and views from a variety of people across the world who value their friendships.
Wish you all a very joyful year ahead, a very thought provoking and meaningful 2021, a loving and happy 2021 with family and dear friends and of course a safe and healthy 2021.
Week 1, 1st January 2021
